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Resolutions: Week 42

I had an oh crap moment mid-breakfast this morning. I forgot to weigh myself! Oops. So I put the blueberry pancake down and headed over to the scale. 194.2. A gain.

It’s been a difficult week this week. Yesterday my caregivee went for a checkup with the surgeon. The ultrasound bone stimulator is doing its job nicely, but there’s still limited shoulder movement. He asked them if they were going to therapy, and they said hand therapy. Medicare will not allow them to go to hand therapy and physical therapy at the same time for whatever reason. So he ordered them to go back to physical therapy.

That was truly frustrating because he’s the one who sent her to hand therapy in the first place. He just came off like he wasn’t reading her chart at all to see where she was at in the scheme of things.

So, after we got out of the office, my caregivee pitched a fit over it. They didn’t want to go back to physical therapy. They felt embarrassed to have to go back, as if they were right back at square one again. I understand. I think I’d probably feel the same way, but having a bad attitude isn’t going to help the matter. They pouted the rest of the evening, and today they seem distant and a scratch moody. I know because they told me which brand of coffee to put in the machine and asked why we didn’t have real maple syrup instead of the other stuff. 😶

Today will be the last day for hand therapy as per the surgeon’s instructions. I disagree with him, but what he says goes. He puts the orders in.

As a Christian, I’m struggling wanting to smack the snot out of this surgeon, and I’m also struggling with why God is allowing all of this. He never makes bad things happen, but He does allow them. I keep asking what I’m supposed to be learning here. Patience? Trust? A strengthening of my faith? I don’t know. My caregivee has the same questions. There’s an opportunity in here, though, to learn something, and I’m trying to find it. I had thought that maybe I’d meet the man I’ll marry this way. (Severe lack of options and opportunities in my area) That may still happen, but for now I’ll just keep on trucking and keep on trusting.

Until next time, stay healthy my friends! 🤗

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